Yes, that's what I am. In the few days since I started blogging, I have really begun to read the blogs of other mothers. I have found that the "lonely mom syndrome" is an epidemic. I mean, really...without exaggeration, an epidemic. First of all, it comforts me to know I am not alone. I would like to thank the mothers that have contacted me to assure me of such. One sweet mom even offered to friend me on facebook. To "A", thank you. I will take you up on that. I am starting a facebook page under my pseudonym so as to not offend anyone in my life if I speak of them in a negative light. Also, speaking of facebook I should point out that my 59 friends, are including a large number of "pages" not actual people, so my actual person count is lower.
Second, it concerns me as to why so many of us are lonely. Are we really lonely, or are our expectations too high? When I was a child, my mother had NO friends. She never went out, she never spoke on the phone, she never had anyone over. She woke up long before my siblings and I did, to start her housework. She stayed up at night, long after our bedtimes for the same reason. Consequently, my siblings and I had no friends, no playdates, no sleepovers, no dance or sports nor did we expect any. We knew no other way to be children then "go outside and play".
When I became a mother, I vowed to change all of that. I watched my own siblings raise their children as we were raised...in a bubble, and swore my children would never be afraid to walk into a room full of people. As I have watched them grow into the young people that I had hoped, I think that I raised the expectations that I had for myself. I expect that if my children can walk up to new children and say "hi, wanna be friends?", that maybe I can too...of course I phrase my "wanna be friends" a little differently, such as " is he/she your only child?" or "I hear that this is a great class".
Anyway, it has yet to work out for me. I will re-post an old blog entry regarding what I thought was really shaping up to be a promising friendship. It was, looking back, quite a comical experience, though at the time it was not.
Second, it concerns me as to why so many of us are lonely. Are we really lonely, or are our expectations too high? When I was a child, my mother had NO friends. She never went out, she never spoke on the phone, she never had anyone over. She woke up long before my siblings and I did, to start her housework. She stayed up at night, long after our bedtimes for the same reason. Consequently, my siblings and I had no friends, no playdates, no sleepovers, no dance or sports nor did we expect any. We knew no other way to be children then "go outside and play".
When I became a mother, I vowed to change all of that. I watched my own siblings raise their children as we were raised...in a bubble, and swore my children would never be afraid to walk into a room full of people. As I have watched them grow into the young people that I had hoped, I think that I raised the expectations that I had for myself. I expect that if my children can walk up to new children and say "hi, wanna be friends?", that maybe I can too...of course I phrase my "wanna be friends" a little differently, such as " is he/she your only child?" or "I hear that this is a great class".
Anyway, it has yet to work out for me. I will re-post an old blog entry regarding what I thought was really shaping up to be a promising friendship. It was, looking back, quite a comical experience, though at the time it was not.
No comments:
Post a Comment